The Pine Valley Bulletin

Welcome to Pine Valley's only online newspaper!

Established 1998


June 21, 1999

Let's jump right in... David went to Liza the morning of her wedding to Adam to once and for all spill the beans. That sneaky bastard actually went through the tunnels under the house to get in! Liza though, was none too pleased to see Dr. David at her door. And he evaded the real issue for awhile, driving her nuts and practically daring him to tell her what this "truth" is. Liza, showing some spunk she hasn't had for awhile, really let David have it. David started to blame his mother for the man he has become, but Liza wasn't buying that excuse. She told him that there comes a time in everyone's life that we have to take responsibility for their own actions and stop blaming their parents for everything (maybe she should give Ryan that speech too). I couldn't have said it better, especially when she said, "So, you're this mean, controlling SOB because you're mother is a bitch?" All she needed to add to that was "suck it up and get on with your life!" Oh wait, that's what I would have said. Liza has a bit more class than I do :)

Of course, David didn't get to tell her because Adam, Tad and Jake burst in. Adam insists that he talk to David alone and no one wants to leave the room, but eventually they all do. Adam thinks he's got some big important blackmail material on David because he got Gillian's story (and the money) about how David gave her and Ryan $100,000 to flee from the police. Well, David had some kind of laugh attack because Ryan wasn't guilty. David was helping an innocent man. Good point, although he wasn't innocent at the time, so something would happen to him. But I just love how David laughs at Adam. He was howling with laughter when Adam, all smugly I might add, tells David what he's got on him. The fact that Adam's crime is much much bigger seemed to escape Adam until just then. And left with no other choice, Adam threatened David. Oh Adam, you silly man... David doesn't care about your threats.

So, with the audience now back in the room... Liza, Adam, Tad, Jake... David is all set to tell his story. But then... David's conscience shows up.. Erica. Erica was so dang cool. She taunted David, pushed him to tell everyone the secret. She told him to prove his mother right, that he is truly evil. Go ahead, ruin more lives like you ruined mine. The whole time David was looking at Erica like there was no way he could do it. He couldn't disappoint her again. It was truly incredible. Erica is the only person who could have ever gotten David to back down from this vendetta, and she did. Erica gets this weeks PERFORMER OF THE WEEK award.

But now, what is David going to tell everyone? He built it up and built it up so much that they won't let him just walk out without telling them all something. A lame ending to a huge build up... David told them he was bluffing. That there was no secret, that he just wanted to torture them all as revenge for setting him up a few years ago. David tells Liza that his wedding gift to her is that he is walking out of her life. Tad doesn't buy it though, and by this time Dixie has arrived and heard everything David said, so she fires him as her doctor. So I wonder, can Tad let it go or will he dig a bit deeper and try to find out the real secret?

Feeling confused, David heads over to Erica's house to talk to her. But instead finds Vanessa there. Vanessa had kept a key to Erica's house and used it to get in and was rifling through her things looking for I don't know what. David is none too pleased to see Mommy dearest. But just when I think he may be in a vulnerable state, he really lets her have it. This was one hell of a confrontation and earned them this weeks SCENE OF THE WEEK. It's really amazing watching these two. David, who never cared for anyone but himself and actually enjoyed destroying lives was incredible as he tried to come to grips with doing something good for the first time in his life. He was actually struggling with the good feelings he was having for not telling everyone what Adam did. And Vanessa, she just couldn't even grasp what doing something good would feel like. Her expressions of shock were totally convincing. Maybe it'll be Vanessa who does the digging and finds out the secret. I know she'd love to spill this and ruin a bunch of lives in the process. Once again, David rejects his mother and she is not happy about it. She asks him if he cares for Erica, and David walks out.

Now, this is where a lot of Vanessa's motivation comes to light... in my view anyway. She is left alone at Erica's and flashes back to when David was a child. The whole flashback focuses on how much her son adores her. It seems to me that that is what Vanessa wants again, and she sees Erica as the hindrance in her getting it. Jealousy, pure and simple. Only the reasons have changed. At first I think Vanessa was using Erica because she wanted all she had... money, fame, power, beauty and yes, even youth. But once Erica and David's relationship started to change, Vanessa viewed Erica as the reason that David doesn't love her. Sure it's delusional, but look who we're talking about here!

Backing up a bit, before David showed up at Erica's, she had another visitor... one Palmer Cortlandt. They talk a bit, get to know each other, Vanessa sees dollar signs and starts to suck up to Palmer. She knows all about him and his business dealings. At the mention of his wife, Palmer tells her how glad he is to be rid of Opal and trashes her to Vanessa. Then Vanessa spins a big tale for Palmer about how devoted of a wife she was. Palmer is impressed by her and is suddenly smitten and asks her out.

It seems as though Palmer went to Erica's because she called him, but that didn't really happen. It was a set up so Opal could call a board meeting without him being there. She wants to get Palmer out of control at Cortlandt Electronics and proposes that Adrian be elected the new CEO. Palmer walks in on this meeting and is not amused. He tries to appeal to Opal to stop the vote, but Opal tells him to get lost. You go Opal!! Then, of course, being Palmer and all, he resorts to trying to eliminate the competition by getting Adrian reinstated in the spy game. Palmer gets this weeks LINE OF THE WEEK award when he says to one of his board members while on the phone, "We are going to have to win it because I'm not going to give up half my life to that spiteful hick and her illegitimate spawn!" Well big duh Palmer! It's his fault that Adrian lost his spy gig when he gave the story about Opal's illegitimate son to the National Intruder. Now he cannot be a spy anymore! I gave him a slap then, and I'm going to give it to him now... Palmer is this weeks I NEED TO BE SLAPPED award recipient.

Well, Raquel is FINALLY out of bed and getting some physical therapy. Amazing. You know, I've really grown to like Raquel although sometimes she's just not too bright. I'll get to that a little bit later. Right now, let's talk about her talk with Damien. Raquel realizes that it's her own fault that Damien hates Hayley because she said she was afraid of Hayley. So she has a little chat with her demon child and tells him that she likes Hayley and that his daddy loves Hayley, and she would never hurt them. Mateo listens in and is very happy to hear what Raquel is telling Damien. Unfortunately Damien is daydreaming about killing Hayley or something because he's sure not listening to his mother.

Mateo bypasses Adam and Liza's wedding to help Raquel with her physical therapy and and play house. Damien whines about wanting to play baseball, so Mateo wheels Raquel out into the linoleum covered courtyard outside and the three of them play baseball. Then, at the mention of Hayley's name Damien's head spins around and he throws the baseball at one of the windows in Mateo and Hayley's condo and purposely breaks it. At this point I'm wondering what they will give Damien this time for his bad behavior, maybe a new bike? Then Mateo actually says that they have to punishment him! And he says, "We have to discipline him, we have to punish him when he does something bad like that or he's going to think that we approve." Well no kidding! It's about time you both finally realize that. Although, Mateo calls Dr. Earl to make sure that punishing Damien is the thing to do, and when he tells Raquel that Dr. Earl approved, Raquel, in a moment of total stupidity says, "Really? we're supposed to punish him?" Duh.

Brooke and Jack actually had a few moments of airtime this week when Jack went to see Brooke at her office after returning from Seattle. He went to see you know who! Brooke fills Jack in on what Vanessa is doing to Erica and asks for Jack's help in protecting her. Jack is very confused by Brooke's involvement, and quite frankly, so am I.

Well here we are, before the wedding. While Liza and Adam are busy trying to figure out what David is going to do, Marian is in a state of total panic because they aren't at the chapel. Barry Shire comes by and hits on her, which is just too cute to toss in there, good job AMC :) Hayley is there with Ryan, showing her disgusting ribby cleavage in a dress that is way too low cut for someone of her... uh, build. Ryan is thinking about his wedding to Gillian. It's so obvious that Ryan is so in love with Gillian and it's torturing him. Gillian too, sees Ryan talking with Hayley and can't help but wish they were together. Hayley notices the looks exchanged between them and finally tells Ryan to either piss or get off the pot! Well.. not in those words, but she did tell him he's being a jerk and that he should either go to Gillian and be with her, or get over it and stop moping. What I don't get is why, through all of these times she's talked to Ryan about Gillian that Hayley herself hasn't tried to talk to Gillian about it. I guess she doesn't want to get in the middle, but she already is and she's friends with Gillian. They don't even speak to each other though... some friends. Anyway, Hayley tells Ryan that he should take a chance on love, and that he should also get help... either with group therapy, one on one therapy or even with Adult Children of Alcoholics meetings. Ryan takes her advice and finds himself at an ACOA meeting.

It's finally time for the wedding. Liza is wearing some bizarre looking kimono with a huge butt bow. Personally, I didn't think the kimono was ugly, but it did not suit Liza at all. In fact, it made no sense. I've never heard Liza show any interest in the Japanese culture, so I just didn't get the significance of the kimono. For once, I would like to see Liza in something a little sexy... I mean come on! Give her a neckline already! Then the bizarre continues as she walks down the aisle with Colby in her arms. Almost as if it's Colby giving her away. OK, aside from all that... the wedding was nice, the sentiments beautiful and Marian's reading was very touching. But then, I can't help but think about how Liza and Adam are step brother and sister! Ew. As Liza is saying her vows to Adam, they are so filled with emotion and I realize that Adam doesn't deserve someone as wonderful as Liza. And yes, Adam's vows to her are also beautiful, but Adam has a big "but" looming over him. He is saying all those amazing things to her, BUT he's also telling her a huge lie. It's like one counters the other. I have two questions though, why didn't they exchange rings? And, with the wedding being at Wildwind, why weren't Edmund and/or Dimitri there?

At the reception at Adam's house, Liza and Jake ask Tad and Dixie to be the Godparents to Colby. Interesting, although no surprising. As Dixie is walking around holding the Baby Colby doll, she starts talking to Hayley about babies. Hayley tells her that they have to wait to start a family because of Max's problems. Hey Dix, there's your opening to tell her that Adam rigged the custody hearing. But no, she doesn't. Later, Liza and Adam give Hayley her bouquet and talk about how great it will be when she finally marries Mateo for real. Hayley isn't so sure about that and leaves the wedding soon after, leaving the bouquet behind. She heads straight to SOS and pours herself a big tall glass of vodka. When Ryan walks in, she hides the glass. But later she admits to having poured it and was going to drink it. But then, Hayley realized that in order to save herself and her sobriety, there is something she must do... leave Mateo. YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!! WOO HOO!!!!

This week's AMC gets a C- Not bad, not great...and I'm a sucker for a wedding :)

Next week, I'll be in South Carolina for a couple days for a cousin's wedding, but I expect to have the Editorial up at some point. Thanks!