The Pine Valley Bulletin

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Established 1998


January 11, 1999

This week the Crystal Ball was in full swing. I don't know about anyone else, but I love when AMC does these big events. It's great seeing everyone all dressed up and partying. You know, I always say that the two things that AMC does right are parties and disasters. This year the party was a lot more sedate yet still enjoyable. I liked how playful Stuart and Marian were, running around that big house like a couple of kids, having fun and planning their wedding. It was too cute when Erica found them hiding under all the coats. So let's jump right in with what else was happening at the Ball this year!

Ryan and Gillian arrived and shocked the crowd. Edmund immediately went bonkers and tried to bully Ryan into leaving, telling him he's uninvited, but Gillian is welcome to stay. All the while Edmund has Miss Kitty at his side. Ugh, that woman is a wretch. After Hayley intervenes, saying she invited them and Dimitri and Miss Kitty tell Ed to take a pill, Ryan and Gillian stay at the Ball. Erica swoops in and starts introducing Ryan around to all the important people of Pine Valley, including the Mayor. You know, I always thought that Pine Valley ran itself, without any need for a mayor, guess I was wrong.

There was a good dose of the Brooke/Erica rivalry at the Ball this year. Now that is something I always enjoy. It's painfully obvious that these two will be duking it out for the love of the fair Dimitri. Actually it seems obvious to everyone involved so far, but Erica. Even Dimitri seems to know it. Erica on the other hand, she has insisted that she and Dim are friends. That is until that quick and out of left field talk from Janet in the coatroom, I think our Ms. Kane may actually start thinking of the possibilities of another go round with the Count. And that is fine by me. I think they are a great couple. Of course this triangle will probably be much more fun than the outcome. Erica and Brooke are always on opposite sides of the fence. Brooke is supporting Kit, Erica supports Ryan. Brooke actually thinks she came out ahead on that one, but oh how wrong she is. In fact she will be the one eating crow with hollandaise sauce, not Erica!

Brooke was certainly making her feelings for Dimitri known all night. She was actually rather brazen about it. She found Dim smoking a cigar in the den and went over to him and took a couple hits of his stogie, then told him she made a mistake and then she kissed him. Erica sees them, and Brooke takes that as her cue to leave, but not without throwing another jab at Erica about how beautiful she is and how lucky Pine Valley is to have her. Fasten your seat belts folks, this is going to be one hell of a ride!

Dimmie had a few things to say to Miss Kitty. She seems to have this incredible need for everyone to like her. She can't stand it that Dim thinks she's a liar. Well honey, you've been a lair all your life, what do you expect! When she confronts him about his feelings towards her, he tells her about when Kendall accused him of rape and he had never touched her. He told her he doesn't trust her, and is afraid she will end up hurting Edmund. She of course gets high and mighty and says that he should think for himself instead of being poisoned by Erica. Uh huh... sure thing babe.

Dr. David spies Ryan and Gillian having a good time so he decides he should try and mess that up. He saunters over to them and starts to taunt Gillian about bail money in front of Ryan. Ryan is clueless about what David is saying, but Gillian is very aware that he could easily spill the beans about how she got that money. Gillian covers her tracks quickly and whisks Ryan away from the devious doc.

Dixie played her favorite game of "I think I'll ruin Tad's date, while I continue on mine." She finds Paige Turner (nice touch there on the name AMC hahaha) and tells her about an audition with Spielberg while he's in Pine Valley. Oh sure, Spielberg would be in Pine Valley and not at the Crystal Ball?? At any rate, Paige falls for it and dashes off, never even telling Tad that she's leaving. And then, after taking a break from messing up Tad's social life, she decides it's her place to tell off Miss Kitty. That whole scene struck me as very very odd.

Raquel got some devious thoughts of her own when she accidentally left her drink sitting next to Hayley's and Hayley picked it up and took a gulp. Oops, Raquel was having rum in her cola, Hayley only had cola. At that point, you could actually see the wheels turning in Raquel's head. She goes off to Gillian and asks her if Hayley has a problem with alcohol. Once again, Gillian inadvertently tells Raquel more than she needs to know.

Miss Kitty is all shook up about being at the Ball with Ryan there too and Eddie comforts her. He tells her that she is smarter and more beautiful than anyone else at the Ball. It's at this point that I have to wonder when Ed started taking drugs. He then asks her to dance and they walk out onto the dance floor. OK, did anyone notice Kit's bizarre arm thing when Edmund was walking with her? She looked like a mannequin! And then she danced the same way, with her arm bent. She was actually holding up her dress, but you really had to look to see that.

Adam professed his love to Liza and she admitted she does still love him. He then proposed to her. I don't know, it struck me as really odd and sudden. Like it just came out of left field. Adam's declaration of love was so touching though. He was so intense that he made Liza cry, and I had a lump in my throat too. But then I was able to swallow my lump because I know what Adam did. And if David has anything to say about it, Liza will know what he did before long too. David is going to great lengths to prove his own suspicions that Adam is the father of Liza's baby so that he can then take his proof to Liza. Now that David has a sample of the baby's DNA, courtesy of Kyle, the lab tech, he comes up with quite an ingenious little plan to get a sample of Adam's DNA so he can compare the two. David took a champagne glass and made a small cut into it and then gave that glass to Adam. When the three of them had a toast, David hit Adam's glass a little harder than normal and the glass shattered in Adam's hand, making him bleed. Well it's Dr. David to the rescue and he got Adam all bandaged up and got a sample of Adam's blood at the same time.

After Gillian and Ryan win the raffle at the Ball, a trip to Aruba, Eddie actually acts cordially and congratulates them. But Miss Kitty can't cope. She runs off, in the middle of winter without a coat and in a spaghetti strapped dress into the cold mausoleum. Seems she wants to have a chat with Maria. I can't figure out what this is all about. Does she want Maria's blessing to be with Eddie? She kept talking about how she wants Edmund to be happy, does that mean happy with her? Who the heck knows, but Eddie finds her and gives her his coat. Chivalry is not dead.

Tad again confronts Dixie about what she's hiding. Dixie again evades the question. Wooden again interrupts them.

Derek has gotten the results of the DNA test on Ryan and gives Jack a call at the hospital where Lily is being treating. We see Jack on the phone with Derek. I know those scenes were filmed really far in advance because Walt Willey (Jack) was leaving for 6 weeks, but sheesh, those scenes looked awful. It was like they filmed them in the hallway at the studio or something. At any rate, selfish Jack says to interrupt the gala and go arrest Ryan. Derek and his flunkies arrive and go to arrest Ryan, making a big scene. Hayley, Erica, and Trevor all intervene, but it's Trevor who gets things calmed down. While Derek and Trevor are discussing Ryan's arrest, we learn that the DNA is only a 70% match. Trevor insists that Derek get a warrant for Ryan's arrest, and Derek finally agrees but says that Ryan must remain in a guarded room while he goes. In the meantime, Dimitri is trying to comfort Gillian, telling her she should move back to Wildwind to be with her family. And Edmund puts that smug little grin back on his face. And Miss Kitty takes this opportunity to try and give Tad an "I told you so" but he's not listening to her. David tries to comfort Gillian, but she runs away from him... good girl!

Up in their bedroom, Mateo tells Hayley that he was just starting to like Ryan and it's too bad this had to happen. Hayley gets angry, telling Mateo that Ryan is innocent. Mateo, of course, gets self righteous and tells her that they have DNA to prove that he did it. This turns into the SCENE OF THE WEEK when Hayley gives it to Mateo with both barrels! She tells him that everything he is telling her about Ryan, she has told him about Raquel and he still believes Raquel's motives are pure. She tells him that his faith in Raquel is OK, but she's being stupid to believe in Ryan? What makes his judgment better? Way to go Hayley!! All she had to do was call him an ass and I would have been really happy. Ugh, that guy and his superiority bug me!

Gillian decides to stand by her man, after Ryan assures her he had no sex of any kind with Miss Kitty. At the same time, Hayley goes looking for Mateo and finds him sharing a dance with Raquel. Of course, Hayley doesn't realize that Max crashed the party and decided to play matchmaker brat by insisting he wants to see his mommy and daddy dance. Well, Mateo and Raquel got so cozy with that dance, they didn't even see Max leave. So Gillian finds Hayley soon after this and asks Hayley for her help. So the two put their heads together and plot a way to get Ryan out of that room so he can run. Hayley comes up with a plan and goes to see Ryan, telling him where he is supposed to go, in a kind of code that even a 2 year old can crack. In the meantime, Gillian lashes out at Miss Kitty, and Edmund the idiot tells Gillian she should leave. As she rushes off, she runs into Eugenia and gets her to create a diversion so the guard will leave Ryan unattended for a minute and he can dash. It works like a charm! Ryan and Gillian go hide out in the crypt that Marian hid in to get away from Lee. Hayley then creates another diversion by driving off, hoping the cops will follow her and Ryan and Gillian can bolt. It works. I just have to wonder when Hayley found time to change her clothes.

Finally, the Ball is over. So, Diva Blackwell is here with her picks for the best and worst dressed at the Ball. First, it sure seems to me that the colors of the year are brown and bronze. Hayley, Dixie, Gillian, Eugenia and Janet all had on some kind of brown dress. Liza and Belinda had the second most popular color with burgundy dresses. So, this year's BEST DRESSED MAN goes to Adrian, hands down! What a cool tux that was. Did you notice that it had a checked pattern on it? I loved it! BEST JEWELS goes to Erica. I loved that choker she was wearing. BEST HAIR goes to Gillian. The lovely upswept do with curls looked fab on her. BEST DRESSED WOMAN goes to Dixie. I loved the dress. That deep brown velvet with the sequin embroidered top was really gorgeous. Hayley gets second place for that lovely dress she was wearing. They had the exact same color scheme going too. WORST DRESSED WOMAN unfortunately goes to my fave woman on the show, Janet. I just don't understand what the heck AMC is thinking. That dress made her look more like a frumpy old lady than the gorgeous woman that she is. And her hair!? What was that? I was so mad when I saw how they made her look. She's Brooke's age for goodness sake's, not Phoebe's!! I couldn't find a worst dressed man, they all looked good to me! And the one complaint I have is that, after all this time, Ruth comes back to the show and they don't even show her and Joe at the Ball!

Back at Cortlandt Manor, Tad and Dixie discover they have adjoining rooms, courtesy of Opal. They get locked in the bathroom, supposedly from the steam swelling the doors. So they have a lot of time to dance around issues, evade questions and give us a big dose of sexual tension. Tad confronts Dixie about what she said to Paige to make her leave the Ball, but she denies any involvement in Paige's disappearance telling Tad that he's not always irresistible. Tad then gives us this weeks LINE OF THE WEEK by answering Dixie with, "Damn close, what with my rapier type wit, boyish good looks and God-like body." Even Dixie had a hard time keeping a straight face after that one!

What is this? Two love scenes for Belinda in two weeks? Has AMC gone mad!!!? I loved it, and I'm thrilled that Belinda and Adrian have this storyline. They are both fab. Adrian tells Belinda he's going to go say goodbye to Opal so he can come back and spend the rest of the night with her. Opal is visibly shaken by Adrian's leaving town, and when she says goodbye and hugs him, a photographer runs in and starts snapping pictures. Adrian runs after the photographer while Opal and Palmer hash it out. Palmer taunts Opal by saying Adrian is her lover. Opal screams at Palmer, telling him that Adrian is not her lover. She finally cracks from Palmer's torment and blurts out that Adrian is her son, just in time for Adrian to hear her. These scene's gave Opal this weeks PERFORMER OF THE WEEK.

On a final note, how cool are those confessions commercials that ABC is running during AMC?