The Pine Valley Bulletin

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Established 1998


August 16, 1999

I think I need to start with Edmund. The guy really confuses me. On the one hand, I'm happy to see him remain suspicious about Alex. I never did buy his blind acceptance of Kit so I like that he is going to look into Alex's past. But then on the other hand, he seems to not remember that it's the anniversary of Maria's death until Alex reminds him by giving him that gift from Dimitri. What's that about? And for that matter, Brooke didn't remember either? It's only been two years, not 20. This was devastating for both of them, and it's not like either of them have blocked it out. Ed has been in mourning, more or less, ever since. And Brooke has that guilt complex about it. And then an even weirder thing happens, Maddie comes into the room and when Ed picks her up he says, "I haven't seen you in so long!" Excuse me? Doesn't he ever see his own children? In fact, Maddie is on twice this week and that alone earns her this weeks PERFORMER OF THE WEEK award.

While I'm talking about Alex, let's discuss how horrible she is at hiding things, keeping secrets and basically acting like all is right with the world. Edmund tells her she is welcome to stay at Wildwind for as long as she would like. The two are talking and getting to know each other, at least that is what Edmund is trying to do. But Alex gets all wacky when Edmund casually mentions that he will probably sell Maximilian, Dimitri's horse. Then she is evasive when Ed asks her how she met Dimitri, she can't put two words together whenever he asks her a question about herself, and then she steals Maddie's photo. If she's supposed to be such a smart and savvy spy woman, then just what is her deal?? She's supposed to keep people from being suspicious of her, not make them suspicious. And again I have to say, how stupid is she that she uses the same last name!? Yes, I do believe she is Anna Devane. I think eventually she will head back to General Hospital. I think that Dimitri is alive and locked away somewhere in a hospital, where he is convalescing from an illness. I think she took Maddie's picture to put it in Dimitri's room. And she doesn't want Ed to sell the horse because Dim will want to ride him again someday.

Later, Jack pays Eddie a visit. Jack is being a total nut job and telling Edmund that he should just accept Alex into his life, and not worry about who she might be. HUH? Didn't Jack used to be the DA? What is his deal? He defended every bit of bizarre behavior that Alex has exhibited. Then Ed tells Jack that Dimitri doesn't have good instincts with women and then has a slam on Erica? Ugh, these two are really pissing me off!

When Brooke shows up to interview Alex, she again gets all evasive and can't talk about herself. She gets all tense when Brooke uses her maiden name, but relaxes when Brooke tells her that Jack saw it on the marriage license. She claims she's too tired and excuses herself. Brooke got almost zero info, and Edmund decides to do a background check on her. Brooke isn't thrilled about it and again I'm struck with just how trusting Brooke and Jack are! There is a bit more to Alex than meets the eye and it's so obvious because Alex herself makes it obvious!

Moving along, this week Tad had talks with all his parents. Tad is feeling like the worst guy on the planet because he just can't get excited about the baby, so while Joe is telling Tad that he needs to get a grip and be there for Dixie, Opal is telling Dixie that she needs to be a little more understanding about Tad's feelings and how scared he is that he will lose her. Then later, Ruth shows up at Tad's office and they talk about it too. Tad starts to loosen up and decides all he can do is help Dixie through the pregnancy. Tad's acceptance of the situation is the perfect recipe for disaster.

At home, Dixie starts to experience some pain in her back and remembers that David said that it might be a sign of kidney failure and to call him immediately. But Dixie decides to lie to Tad instead, telling him she feels fine and then he leaves for work. This is turning into a pattern for Dixie isn't it? When she got sick when they were supposed to meet on top of the building, Dixie lied to Tad then about being ill. Dixie gets this weeks CLEOPATRA award, Queen of Denial! Luckily, Dixie has an appointment with David, so she heads over to the hospital and goes to her appointment. Then she LIES to David about feeling good. When David tells her they need to a routine blood test, he leaves the room to go work out the details and Dixie experiences another pain so she leaves! Right here, this earns her this weeks I NEED TO BE SLAPPED award. Yes she wants this baby and she's scared of what is happening, but when you are warned about symptoms that can be dangerous, you don't go leaving the hospital!

Dixie wonders around the hospital in a fog of pain and confusion. When a nurse comes by and asks her if she needs help, Dixie goes loopy and starts yelling at her. Ruth comes by and sees Dixie and after talking to her for a bit, Dixie again goes loopy and runs out. What does she do? She goes home. Brilliant move. Scott and Becca are there, ready to film her and Dixie grits her teeth through the pain and goes on camera talking about how much she wants this baby. It's moving, it's sad and it's this weeks SCENE OF THE WEEK. Dixie is so confused and spacey, but her pain is real and while she's on camera talking, it almost looks like she realizes she is losing the baby. When she stands up, Becca sees blood on her leg.

What do I think about all this? I know all you Tad and Dixie fanatics are going to write and bitch me out, but such is life. I think this miscarriage story was the exact right move to make. And don't go accusing me of hating Dixie because I don't. But I think that if everything were simple and perfect then there would be no storyline at all. Having Tad and Dixie beat the odds would be nice, but then what? A happy pregnancy, a happy marriage, a healthy and happy birth... all that transfers to no storyline. Who is happily married with no conflicts on AMC? Joe and Ruth, and Janet and Trevor. So ask yourself this... do you want Tad and Dixie to be happy and never seen, or do you want to be able to see them on the show? You can't have it both ways.

At the hospital, Ryan runs into Hayley and she's all 'tude. She sure doesn't take to rejection very well does she? Ryan stopped her from making a big mistake, sleeping with him and she can't deal with it. She's all over his case and is thisclose to getting a slap this week when she tells him "I don't need your help anymore!" Then during her AA meeting (yeah Axel!!!) she complains about Ryan and then suddenly realizes that he's probably the best friend she's ever had. After the meeting, she finds him and they go back to the loft so she can apologize to him. They decide that they are attracted to each other, but they cannot act on it and will remain friends only. Then Hayley gets an emergency call from the club so they head to SOS together so Ryan can show her how to fix the AC unit that is acting up. Hey, wasn't that the problem at Holidays too? Watch out! She's gonna blow!!!!

Well we almost got through a whole week without Assholeo. His showing up on Friday really messed up the grading curve. And there he was, chatting it up with Eddie, saying how horrible he's been to Hayley and how basically, he wants her back. I'm sorry, but the things he said to her are unforgivable! He went way beyond angry and landed smack dab into abusive. I know AMC is going to get Hayley and Assholeo back together eventually, but damn... I think it's wrong. I think that Hayley already has self-esteem issues and being with Assholeo can only make them worse. The minute she does something that he doesn't like, he lashes out like some kind of possessed freak. And after talking to Ed for a bit, Assholeo decides to head over to SOS. How convenient, Ryan and Hayley are there too. Fancy that, so are Gillian and Raquel. Gilly took Raquel out for a night on the town since Max stayed in Texas with his grandparents. Once they are out, Raquel is gushing about Mateo. She decided to go for it again now that Hayley is out of the way... so she thinks. Gilly isn't too thrilled by this news.

Earlier, Ryan stayed with Gillian at Wildwind to comfort her through her grief about Dimitri's death. Seems Eugenia isn't taking the news very well so Gillian has decided to move back to Wildwind for a little while to watch after her. While Gilly is tending to Euggie, Edmund comes in and asks Ryan to be there for Gillian, that he's the only one that can help her through this. It's true too. And when Gilly is upset and talking about how Eugenia is getting on in years and if she dies, Gillian will be alone in the world, I'm all but screaming at Ryan to SAY IT!!! SAY IT!!! He doesn't say it though. What a disappointment. In case you don't know, I wanted him to say that she would never be alone and he would always be there for her.

Has there ever been anything more boring than this documentary storyline? It's so incredibly dumb and totally uninteresting. I can't even stand it! And now we have the new bitch on the block, Greenlee, in the mix. My immediate reaction to Greenlee? Wow what a bitch on wheels! Maybe she'll make this storyline interesting. The latest Deer Caught In The Headlights girl on AMC, Becca, is already jealous of her. It's obvious that Greenlee and Scott shared more than film classes and you know, I already kind of like this new girl. But then again, I always like a bitch... wonder why?

David takes Erica on a romantic picnic to, where else, the Boathouse. I was laughing my butt off when Erica said something about it being her favorite spot and David says, "oh you've been here?" Duh David!! Everyone in Pine Valley knows the spot! So David is the king of gourmet food in Tupperware. I wonder if anyone in Pine Valley ever eats hot dogs and hamburgers when they go on a picnic. They are spotted in a serious liplock by Scott and Becca (and Becca later blabs about seeing them to Myrtle). David decides that he and Erica need to be somewhere alone and where they won't be disturbed so he whisks her away to the Inn.

At first, they dance around the issue of being there to do the horizontal hula and Erica actually plays innocent, which is a laugh riot! Once the sweet talking starts though, you can see her melting. Did you know that's all it takes to get Erica in the sack? A little sweet talk? It's true. Then more laughs ensue when David starts to move in and he means business, but Erica backs off saying she's never done this before, and "I'm a very moral person." Oh sure Erica, you were so moral when you boinked Mike Roy while you were engaged to Jack huh? Erica explains to David that she cannot make love with someone unless she's in love with them, or has at least convinced herself that she's in love with them. David said, "And you can't convince yourself that you love me." Erica replies with this weeks LINE OF THE WEEK when she says, "David, I have a hard time convincing myself that I like you." Lust took over from there and they did it anyway.

OK, there's a couple random things before I end this saga. 1) How in the world does Alex know David? She spotted him at Seaview Hospital talking to some snotty nurse and hid so he wouldn't see her. Why is Alex there, to talk to Dr. Silbert again most like because he is in cahoots with her over keeping Dimitri's whereabouts a secret. 2) Opal is pretty ticked when she realizes that Vanessa is cruising the Mediterranean with Palmer and supposedly they come back with a shocking surprise. So... what do we think that is people? Did Nessie and PC tie the knot while they were away?

This week's AMC gets a D. Numerous factors brought it down from a possible C, for instance MUSIC MONTAGE!!!! Ugh, you know how much I hate those, Assholeo's arrival on Friday when I thought we had a whole week without him, and way way too much of the boring Scott and Becca storyline.